the dawning of the sun

when the world sleeps i can hear my thoughts in full stream.

so i've been scared of leaving home..yeah irvine has become my home away from home. if not, more of a home than the bay because i grew up the most here. independently from my family and dependently on my friends and mentors. dependency has been a challenge. within my core being i don't feel special, don't feel like i deserve to be loved. since i have been here though, i have made more friends than i have in my entire life back at home. i have found more people with the same values as i do who continue striving to make the world a better place. because of that, i am scared to show any signs of love and say goodbye, scared to finish my personal statement, and ask "who am i?" because the truth is...i truly am happy here.

i am trying to put the sweet in the bitterness of these lasts. i'm not a very reminiscent person because of my beliefs in time and usually because i have no one to reminisce with and i'm sorry i don't list peoples names individually and tell you exactly what you've done for me. those are my flaws and i'm working on that. know that as i write this note, images of people come flashing through my mind and these are the images i will hold in my heart wherever i go. and i also know that it's hard for me to use other verbs besides love but i can't help it....love has consumed my heart and i love love love. Brisa, SPOP, CCC, SMLI, REACH, VDC, Briarwood, UCI, Aldrich Park, the OC. i feel and am blessed, feel proud to have taken this path, to be loved and to love....to love and be loved in return...yeah...nothing gets better than this. thank you for the big hoohah!